Cool Contributions (So I Don’t Get Shunned)

4 04 2012

That’s right, people, the world has ended.  Now what?

Let’s say the apocalypse comes tomorrow, and next week we’re picking up the pieces and building our post-apocolyptic society.  We’re a resiliant people, you know we’ll get started right away.  Life, of course, is so drastically different that we can barely even imagine it now.  So churn your brain cells around and really get them moving.  This is extremely important.

What are you going to contribute to our new, ram-shackle society???

I really didn’t just pull this out of thin air – so I can’t take credit for this crucial conversation.  A while back, while visiting Spokane, a friend of a friend randomly asked this.  In the bar, no less.  I had a girl-crush on her from this moment on.  What a great conversation starter!!  And it got me thinking – if we suddenly lived in a survival state, back to a super primitive lifestyle, things like my mad internet skills would suddenly be moot.  How would I make sure I didn’t suddenly become a sacrificial lamb so as not to be the weakest link in the societal chain?!

At the time, I was coming up pretty dry on ideas….

I have people skills!  I can bring people together, help keep peace in our community, help make decisions.  I’ll just be the leader!  (I’m starting my campaign immediately.  Kalista for PA* President!)  *post-apocolyse, duh

But what the heck else?  I don’t think anyone would let me just sit around “supervising” (despite how good at that I am) and not lend a hand in the work. People like my brother and J and my friend the boy-scott leader – these are the people that will become the chiefs of new tribes. Why? Because they have survival skills that matter. No one will care that I can beat a challenging Sudoku!! I’ll be the last kid picked; no one will want me in their village. Useless people are shunned, of this I’m certain.

Forest Ranger clearing trails

J uses more survival skills in one day at work than most people possess throughout their lifetime. Dibs for my team!

In the months since that fateful Spokane visit, I’ve been working to change things. Fortunately, I can be pretty sneaky about it, not let others know, and thus have a bit of an advantage. My preparations look to the outside world like new hobbies and fun little projects. Heck no, I’m prepping for imminent disaster.

First, I started cooking. Valuable skill, right?! People will want me if I can feed them! Granted, I’m not super amazing at this yet, but I’m working on it. Honing my skills. Speaking of food, I can also help grow it! We had a mega-huge garden while I was growing up; I picked up a few gardening skills. And J and I are planting our own garden once winter finally packs up and leaves, so once again – honing my skills. Food is going to be of extreme value, so I figured this was a sure-fire way to land a spot in the community. Probably a pretty good spot, too, nice and important.

drinking wine while cooking

See? I can cook! I can even drink wine and cook at the same time!

However, this may not be enough. Cooking and tending my crops probably won’t take up all my time. Well, it might, but I need more than one skill. You know, a back-up plan. Thus my new knitting “hobby” I told you about. Oh, yeah, making clothes and warm accessories for my EOTW compadres. If I’m still up here in Washington at the time of the great asteroid, or whatever it’s to be, we’ll be in need of warm clothes for sure. Maybe I’ll even raise the sheep and alpacas and goats and then I can not only have their hair/wool to spin for yarn (a new skill I’ll have to acquire, or team up with someone already possessing this skill…any takers?) but I’ll also then have animals for food and milk. Goat cheese certainly makes our new-world scenario sound more appealing.

sheep goats and alpacas

Aw, look, they're even kind of cute (image courtesy of

So what do you think? Is growing and preparing food, some animal husbandry, and knitting going to be enough to earn me a spot amongst the other survivors? Do you think this would be enough to get me in the running for village mayor? Maybe president? How about PA Queen?

Here’s the real question: what are YOU going to contribute to our PA society? What do YOU have to offer that would make me want to pick you, should I indeed become Queen of the Lands mayor?  I only want people who can pull their own weight, so it better be good.  No slackers on my team!

Not to get too off-topic, but have you ever seen the show “Eureka“? It’s on Netflix instant streaming – you should watch it. If you’re into nerdy science stuff and the world almost coming to an end on a daily basis, then you should DEFINITELY watch it. I have come to adore the show and all its outrageous characters. And today I happened to stream Season 3, Episode 18 all about – you guessed it! – the end of the world! (Evacuate the town!)

SyFy original Eureka

The town probably needs to be evacuated, the whole west coast is in danger and we all might DIE! Don't worry, Sheriff Carter is figuring out how to save the day. (image courtesy of

Anyway, they pointed out that the end of the world could involve massive chaos in the form of world-wide earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanic eruptions, hurricanes, pretty much every natural disaster there is. So I just want to let you know that so far in my short life, I’ve survived tornadoes and an earthquake, and narrowly missed several hurricanes and tsunamis. Just in case, I also have escape plans for volcanoes. Therefore, I think you’ll be safest sticking with me.

Kalista for PA President!




2 responses

5 04 2012
Stacie Chadwick

Love the drinking and cooking. Especially the drinking. =)

6 04 2012

Thank you! I’m convinced wine loosens you up and makes you a better cook. Or is that just me? 🙂

Give it to me straight -

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