The Scariest Thing EVER.

5 04 2013

I’m terrified.

Not because of the month-long writer’s block.

Not because of the horrible nightmare I had last night where I cut bangs for myself with a rusty pair of scissors and they looked awful.

Not even because I had to go down to the haunted end of the compound multiple times last night to do my stupid laundry since I’m totally out of clean underwear. (I hate not having my own washer and dryer.)

Oh no, the Scariest Thing EVER goes way beyond all these. Hide the kids’ eyes, cover the dog’s ears, and brace yourself, people:
I have registered for a half marathon.

Happy Girl Dirty Half Marathon registration, Sisters OR

Sweet Jesus, what have I done?

There are many things that make this The Scariest Thing Ever.

  1. I haven’t run consistently enough to call myself a “runner” since middle school track. (I barely work out at all….and only occasionally. Do you think that matters?)
  2. I’ve never run farther than 6 miles at once in my whole life, and the one time I did was fueled by a messy break-up, the best playlist known to man (right before I lost all the music in my iTunes), and the promise of massive amounts of chocolate when I got home.
  3. The race is in November. I can barely commit to what we’re having for dinner tomorrow and I’m supposed to plan for this event 6 and a half months away?!
  4. My training buddies live 3+ hours away. That makes it difficult to run together, unless we all have tablets and Skype our runs. Which would be great – who wants to buy me a tablet?!

As you can see, I have reason to be as nervous as a baby in a shark tank. But damn it all, under all that crap I’m so stinking excited I can hardly contain myself. I’m gonna run a half marathon! That’s 13 miles!! The evening of November 2 (’cause let’s be honest, it’s going to take me all day) I get to check an item off my bucket list. Actually go through with something: check! Surviving hours of grueling continuous physical exertion also referred to as “running”: check check!! The anticipation of the high I’m going to have when I’ve accomplished this major goal is part of what’s keeping me motivated!

Plus, I’ll have company. Well, let me rephrase that: a group of gal pals will be with me at the starting line, and through all the horrors of training up until race day. Being seasoned athletes, I don’t expect to actually keep up with any of them, but the support and motivation they’ll offer pre-hell race day is what I’m stoked about. I don’t want to miss a training run because I hate admitting when I’m a slacker. I downloaded the Nike Running app to my phone so I can track my distance and all that other crap, and I just realized I can add the other ladies as my virtual training buddies. This is quadrupally important since I don’t actually live in the same state as any of them, so running together side-by-side is physically impossible. Except on my frequent visits to Bend, but you get the point.

I’ll try not to complain rave about my progress too much, but expect to hear updates throughout the summer!

So, in other news, I’ve been a bit absent lately. I can’t really tell you why, other than a busy schedule, feeling a bit under the weather (which often had me asleep before 9pm), and wicked writers block. But, for anyone who cares to catch up, here’s what’s been going on the last month or so:

  • My parental units and their foster baby (my little cupcake!!) flew half-way across the country for a week-long visitation. Long story short: we had a blasty blast, and I finally got my mommy fix. It had only been a year since I saw either of my rocking awesome parents. (How did I let that happen?!)
  • I forgot where I lived. Ok, not literally, but close. We’ve been gone every weekend, and then spent two weeks in Bend. Simba is one confused pup, but had so much fun with his bestie Osa, it was worth it. And he just adores going to work every day.
  • My friend hosted a murder mystery dinner party for her birthday, and I got to dress up as a Roman Vestial Virgin for the evening. And I wasn’t the killer. If you haven’t done one of these before, I highly recommend it!!
  • We hiked Dog Mountain, our first snow-free hike of the season. Simba thought the mountain was his and he conquered it in fine form. Me, not so much, but I didn’t die. We also hiked the historic Columbia Gorge highway on Easter. I’m trying to get my hiking legs back in shape, though all this running mumbo-jumbo will probably do that for me!

Ok, that’s it. I have to go – it’s Friday night and I have shananigans to get into!!





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